Subject: More sillyness

Why God Never Received Tenure at Cambridge

  1. Because he had only one major publication. 
  2. And it was in Hebrew. 
  3. And it had no cited references. 
  4. And it wasn't published in a refereed journal or even submitted for
peer review. 
  5. And some even doubt he wrote it himself. 
  6. It may be true that he created the world but what has he done since? 
  7. The scientific community has had a very rough time trying to replicate
his results. 
  8. He rarely came to class, just told students to read the book. 
  9. He expelled his first two students for learning. 
 10. Although there were only ten requirements, most students failed his
 11. His office hours were infrequent and usually held on a mountain top.

Subject: LX Jokularity

How many people from Trinity does it take to change a lightbulb?
One -- he holds the bulb and the world revolves around him.

How many people from New Hall does it take to change a lightbulb?
None -- they look better in the dark

How many people from Peterhouse does it take to change a lightbulb?
Two -- one to call the electrician, and the other to mix the martinis.

How many people from Kings does it take to change a lightbulb?
76 - One to change the bulb, fifty to protest about the bulb's right to
stay in the socket even though it's not working, and 25 to organise a

©Eddy Langley - This page last updated 7 November 2003